Ronni Ancona

 

 

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Cognitively Challenged Ronni Fans

We've had so many nutters email us here that it's difficult to know where to start, so we thought it would be easier to start with the most recent and work back. A week ago or so we received a letter from someone who is clearly feeling let-down by the current NHS provision for mental health:

Dear Ronni,
 
Let me start by saying that I am the biggest Victoria
Beckham fan ever. I would also love to tell you that I have a
foot fetish and would do anything on this planet to lick
Victoria's feet but I know that this could never happen. I am
asking you if it would be possible to lick your feet and
pretend that you were her? It would be an honour and the
greatest achievement of my life. I have an insatiable appetite
for Victoria's feet and to get down on my hands and knees and
lick between your toes would be heaven. I know that this is a
strange request and you may think this a joke. I am not joking
and this comes from the bottom of my heart.
 
If my request is refused, I must ask one more favour, would it
be then possible to have a pair of your old high heels, so
that I can pretend that they are Victoria's?
 
Thank you for your understanding and look forward to hearing
from you as soon as possible.
 
Chris.
Chris - you're a mentalist! Go-on, poke him with a stick and laugh!

Name:       Phil
Email:      xxxxxxxxxxxx@yahoo.co.uk
Impression: Carol Smilie
Comments:   Ive been looking n the internet for some nude photos but i cant
seem to find any....anyway thanks for the great site a had a good
masterbation setion looking at the pictures
Date:       Wed,  9 Jun 2004 15:09:13 +0100
So glad we could be of assistance Phil. May we humbly suggest you look at yourself in the mirror and repeatedly shout the phrase "I can change, I will change".

Name:       Tony 
Email:      tonyXXX@hotmail.com
Impression: Nigella Lawson
Comments:   Ronni is great comedian & stunning looking. Also has fantastic Bazooka Joes really impressive and real, watching her shows my buttocks have
quivered sometimes and felt a deep stirring in my loins. Should be much more famous than she is! 
Date:       Sat, 15 Nov 2008 10:41:26 +0000
I'd see a doctor about that if I were you mate. Might be bowel trouble.

Name:       Adrian Pepin
Email:      ade@zen.co.uk
Impression: On Parky
Comments:   What a fantastic lady - shame this website gets in the way of fans ebjoying er on demand. Only wanted to see the parky interview again and forced
to deal with yahoo. Never mind. I'll just move on. Best of luck Ronnie. Especially with getting a better fansite . . .
Date:       Fri, 02 Jan 2009 18:34:02 +0000
Really sorry to have let you down Adrian. Hope it didn't interfere with your regular onanistic regime. To help improve the site, I've nominated Adrian as the clearinghouse for all future complaints, criticisms and rants. If you feel you have something to say, no matter how ill-informed, ignorant, or irrelevant it may be, send an email to Ade and he can let me know.

Date: Sat, 17 Sep 2011 23:09:20 +0000

From Grizzly 

Favourite Ronni Impression: Lorraine kelly

The only female Sweaty (Jock) I can think of who is very hot. As a rule I dont usally care for them. When average/ugly men have money, the cliche goes it makes them more desirable/better looking. Well with women, the more funny they are, the more attractive I find them. Ronni's hot tho, even if she wasn't funny. If I had my time again I'd marry her given the chance. Keep up the good work with the site.

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